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November 01, 2018 7 min read
"We can’t get through one episode without Kameron and LeeAnne having a powwow about D’Andra!"
I am so glad everyone decided to tune in after the craziness of last week, because I sure didn’t want to!
I was truly delighted that Cary asked me to go on the trip to Copenhagen to explore her family heritage and strengthen the bond with her dad. Cary and I have a common thread as only children, and I am a big advocate for family bonding since I have such a small immediate family. And, since both of my fathers are deceased, I fully support Cary in becoming closer to her daddy as I miss both of mine so much and wish I had been given more time with them. Lucky for me, her relatives are in one of my favorite cities! I was excited and honored that she would want to include me! I am a big food lover, and Copenhagen is world renowned for their famous chefs and Michelin star restaurants, but the jarred pickled herring was not on my bucket list of foods to try before I kick the bucket! A note and a danish would have sufficed!
Speaking of fishy smells… If you knew your “best friend” was in the process of taking over a company and focusing on new product formulations, rebranding, and a relaunch, would you give her more than 12 hours notice to go wedding dress shopping with you? After chastising me for not taking my business seriously for months, LeeAnne of all people should have been understanding and supportive of my dedication to my job and my busy work schedule. LeeAnne showed my texted response to her last-minute invitation, which was not pointed and sarcastic in any way, no matter how she chose to read or interpret it. She failed to reveal the time stamp on her phone that showed that she invited me the night before! She invited Stephanie over TWO WEEKS prior to that at the '80s party. I was literally already in bed, and I had a lot planned already for the next day that could not be canceled. Even in the text that LeeAnne sent to me, she specifically said it was “very preliminary” shopping. Considering she still had not set a date at this point, I assumed it would not be my only chance to go!
LeeAnne failed to mention that part of the story when she told the other girls at the fitting that I was invited. I did not “choose” to skip out on all the wedding bliss. LeeAnne chose to not have me there.
There was a lot to be done at work that day. I was nervous going into my mom’s office to ask her about the contracts being drawn up that would turn over the company to me! My mom and I have always had a tumultuous relationship when it comes to money and business. However, lately, it seemed that Mama Dee was really ready to see me sink or swim! So, I was excited to keep moving forward.
It was also nice to hear my mom say, “D’Andra is not an alcoholic.” What a concept! Knowing that my mom has my back and that she is not letting LeeAnne’s manipulation tactics get to her, it’s a relief. My mom is getting older and constantly worries about me, so for LeeAnne to try to disparage me by using my mom, a 77-year-old woman, as part of her strategy is disgusting and just plain wrong!
Oh, and of course, we can’t get through one episode without Kameron and LeeAnne having a powwow about D’Andra’s inappropriate behavior! Now I am a psycho? What is that all about! They don’t even know me, apparently, which is interesting, because they sure talk about me like they do! And, Kameron, you asked who doesn’t have time to go to a wedding dress fitting? Someone who actually runs a business and goes to an office as part of her daily routine. The fact that the two of you are sitting in Kameron’s living room in the middle of the day talking about ME says a lot.
Kameron, if I am embarrassing other people with the last name Simmons, which I don’t think is for you to decide, WHY DO YOU CARE? You might want to know, just for giggles and laughs, that my mother was married into the Simmons’ family five years prior to another Simmons’ matriarch, so I would drop it if I were you!
I am sorry that you spend all of your time walking on eggshells around the Westcotts. That must be really miserable. I know, because I used to do it with my own family name. If you want to keep it up, you better listen to Jimmy and be careful who your friends are. Some of the riff-raff you’ve been hanging out with and having over for rose water would have trouble passing the background check that is apparently required of Kameron’s friends! And, I bet the “How to Keep Your Man Happy” demonstration your new bestie displayed last week isn’t in the socialite primer and definitely isn’t acceptable luncheon conversation for a debutante...but you wouldn’t know that because you weren’t one, so if I were you I would hold my tongue! I guess you are too far up LeeAnne’s ass. Besides, if you ever stop agreeing with every single thing LeeAnne says, she may karate chop YOU in the throat next!
I have said this before, and I will say it again: LeeAnne knows NOTHING about society or what it means to be a part of it. She says I am the one who doesn’t get what it means to be a Simmons? Which one of us is ACTUALLY a SIMMONS??? LeeAnne, you have spent the better part of your adult life trying to climb the social ladder, but let me tell you, it is a long fall.
If LeeAnne didn’t want to come to the Jack Retro pajama party, she should have stayed home! It would have been more fun without her anyway. I mean, I had Brandi in a onesie. What else do you need? LeeAnne not being there wouldn’t have made a difference in the evening. The debut of the new Hard Night Good Morning and Ultimate Living products was a huge success. It felt amazing to know that people were receptive to my new products and the reformulation of the Green Miracle! I was a little nervous to introduce the new formula because Green Miracle, and really all of Ultimate Living, was my mom’s baby for so long. Green Miracle is our flagship product, and it’s been around for over 20 years! Incidentally, I am also allergic to grass and this product is fine for me to take--not at all the same thing, LeeAnne! With mom turning the company over to me, I wasn’t the only one who had to get used to me making the decisions. Mama Dee was so great at the pajama party, and it felt like our first big step in the transition. It was good for her to see that I knew what I was doing, just as much as it was for me!
I felt a tad bit guilty watching Cary and me talk about the trip to Copenhagen. She was right, it’s not all about me (though I think someone needs to tell Kameron and LeeAnne that). This trip is about Cary bringing her friends to experience her family’s heritage with her and for her to get closer to her extended family. So, I am sorry Cary, if it seemed like I was trying to make it about me. I will also go ahead and apologize to Cary and Brandi that my mother basically threatened to kill them if I was harmed on the trip! LOL, I told y’all she was protective.
Let’s just be honest, Mama Dee came for everyone at this party. You would have thought that when Mama Dee told LeeAnne that she was ALSO hurting MY feelings with the things she was saying to me and about me, it was the first time it had ever dawned on LeeAnne! Oh, wait…that’s because it was! LeeAnne is not very keen to irony these days. She forgot all about her horrid accusations of Mark last season when she told Cary that her relationship was no one’s business, and now I guess she forgot that alcohol was just for us alcoholics, because she is going to “drink her way through” the trip to Copenhagen! Hmm…
Honestly, LeeAnne can call me what she wants: alcoholic, poor, crazy, psycho bit--, none of it really matters in the end to me. Yes, it’s hurtful to hear someone who you once considered your best friend call you every name in the book, however, I will still have my business, my husband, and everything else good in my life regardless of her accusations! However, Brandi is under a microscope right now and LeeAnne accusing her of being an alcoholic could be VERY damaging to the adoption process of her baby son, Bruin. LeeAnne knows this, and she doesn’t care. Anything that fits LeeAnne’s agenda, right?!
I am so glad everyone got to see one wedding this season! See how understanding Stephanie is of Brandi having prior obligations?! She was hurt and disappointed, of course, that Brandi couldn’t stay. However, she understands that business and professional responsibilities sometimes have to come first, and this incident was AN ACTUAL WEDDING. Of course, Stephanie looked gorgeous, as always, and the ceremony was so sweet. Congratulations on ten years! I hope you have many more happy years to come! I also hope Stephanie’s mother is fully recovered from the heart attack that Travis gave her by saying the words “butt-sex”! Men…they say the cutest things, ha!
My hubby said something really cute, too, when he told me to simply ask Kameron why we had a problem! Jeremy has clearly never spoken to Kameron because asking her a question is no simple task. Do we need to go back to Beaver Creek where Kameron found her spirit animal: the badger. Kameron has consistently said that I attacked her at Jeremy’s mural reveal when I just asked her why she and Jimmy decided that a cooking party in the midst of a bunch of guests was a good time for them to confront me about “my behavior”! I was extremely nervous to get on that plane with the other girls. Kameron and LeeAnne were clearly forming some type of strange alliance against me, for what reason, I am still not sure. Also, I chose not to upgrade to first class due to saving and investing in my business--hence the $200. Coach is uncomfortable for an international flight, but those are the types of sacrifices this “spoiled brat” is making to ground my business “firmly in the black” during this time of transition. Plus, I really didn’t mind being as far away from Kameron as possible.
Tune in next week to watch the MMA fight…err… I mean RHOD.
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